Claire thought the interview had been going well-- even better than expected-- until
now. The last question had caught her completely off-guard. She glanced away,
swallowed hard, then returned her gaze across the table, where John, the Human
Resources guy and Rose, the department V.P. sat patiently awaiting her reply.

"Could you repeat the question?", she asked, trying not to sound as confused as she
was.

"Your laugh.", said Rose. "We need to hear your laugh."

"My laugh?"

"It's hard to explain", explained John, apologetically. "But it's an important part of
our interview process. Before we bring any new people into this department, we
just... well... want to know how they laugh. Now, if you'd be so kind."

After a long, puzzled pause, Claire cleared her throat and tried her best.

"Ha?... Ha?"

"No, no, no!", said John. "You can't just say the word 'Ha'. You have to laugh--
really laugh."

"But I don't have anything to laugh ABOUT!", cried Claire. "I just can't burst out
laughing for no reason!"

John and Rose exchanged an understanding look.

"Try the books, John.", suggested Rose.

John fumbled in his briefcase and retrieved two paperbacks. He opened the smaller
of the two and began to read.

"Knock, knock.", he said, looking to Claire for a reply.

"Uh... Who's there?", she asked, hoping she had made the correct response.

"Goat."

"Goat who?"

"Goat to the door and find out!"

John and Rose leaned forward, anticipating a burst of laughter.

"Well?", asked John.

"Well what?", asked Claire.

"Well... LAUGH!"

"But it wasn't FUNNY!"

"I guess you're right.", John admitted. "I'll try again." He opened the second book
and flipped through the pages.

"Y'know why gorillas have big nostrils?", he asked. "Cuz they've got big fingers."
No response. "What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Nacho cheese!". This
brought a slight curl to the ends of Claire's mouth. "O.K. then", John continued,
"What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Anyone can roast beef!"

A smile broke across Claire's face... then slowly faded. John and Rose sat back
with a groan, like golfers who had just missed an easy putt.

"Not funny enough, eh?", asked Rose.

"Oh, it was funny", Claire admitted, "just not 'yuk-yuk' funny." Rose reached for the
telephone and dialed an extension.

"Time for the heavy artillery.", she said, turning to John. A few moments later, a
colorful box was delivered to the conference room and placed on the table in front of
John.

"Ready?", he asked Rose.

"Ready.", she replied.

"Ready?", he asked Claire.

"Uh... ready for what?"

"For a funny little surprise.", replied John. With that, he lifted the lid, a spring
snapped, a lemon meringue pie shot out of the box and exploded across his face.

It did the trick. In spite of her confusion and anxiety, Claire laughed until her sides
and cheek muscles ached. It was a clear, cheerful, bubbly laugh-- a delightful thing
to hear. John and Rose exchanged smiles. She would do just fine.

"Congratulations Claire.", they said. "You're hired."



It was company policy that each new employee be assigned a sponsor-- someone
who could show them the ropes and help them to get settled. Claire's was Emma
Brown, an older woman who had been as friendly as she was helpful. Even on her
first morning, Claire felt comfortable enough with Emma to ask about her strange
interview.

"You mean 'The Laugh Test'?", asked Emma.

"Yes.", replied Claire. "What in the heck was THAT all about?" Emma lowered
her voice before she replied.

"It's because of Hank Blough.", she whispered, pointing toward the far side of the
cubicle-filled room. "He's one of our engineers, but he's got this.... this problem...
with his... "

Before she could finish, and as if on cue, there arose across the room the most
disturbing noise Claire had ever heard. If one were to stand a pack mule in a puddle
of water and plug it into a wall socket, a similar sound would result. This awful
racket trailed off into a series of high-pitched, staccato screeches that the staff had
come to refer to as, 'crows-in-a-blender'.
("EEE-AWW-EEE-AWW-kak-kak-kak-kak-kak!") These were followed by the
sound of groans, snapping pencils and heads banging on desks in the surrounding
cubicles.

"... his laugh." Emma had waited until the noise subsided to finish her sentence. "It's
extremely disruptive, but strictly speaking, it's not a violation of any policy. So we
just have to put up with it. That's why we do 'The Laugh Test' on new hires."

Being the ambitious sort and wanting to make a good impression in her new job,
Claire took it upon herself to find a solution to this awful problem. She succeeded
on her third attempt.

Her first solution was to issue ear plugs to everyone on the floor except Hank. It
helped with the laugh problem, but made communications difficult. For the week
they tried, most phone calls and conversations in the department consisted mainly of
'Huh?', 'Eh?' and 'What?'.

Her next try was a bit more aggressive. The notion was that Hank could be trained
not to laugh if negative stimuli were introduced every time he did-- in the same way
that cows learn to avoid the electric fence. During this period, each of Hank's
outburst were followed by the sound of his co-workers slamming doors and
drawers, knocking trash cans over, dropping cookie tins filled with marbles and
activating a worn-out electric pencil sharpener that sounded like a dentist's drill.
Hank never seemed to notice.

The third and successful attempt involved doing to Hank what the company had
done to every other disruptive, incompetent or problem employee.

Two weeks after their next quarterly reviews, peace had returned to the
department. In the entire company, only one person still had to suffer Hank's awful
laughter. She was executive secretary Matilda Brockworthy, who worked outside
the remote, top floor, corner office of Senior Executive Vice-President, Hank
Blough.